Sunday, June 19, 2011

The Day of Forgiveness

                                                              My Dad and Daughter
As a little girl I was never close with my earthly Father. My parents divorced when I was 2 and i simply didn't know the man I called Dad. Unfortunately I spent many years bound in resentment and bitterness over this. I felt unloveable and my bad choices through my teens and early twenties just added fuel to that fire. I blamed way too much on a man who I believe today did the best he could to love me. Today holds a dear place in my heart for so many reasons, it marks the one year anniversary of the day I forgave my Dad. Sitting in church a year ago today, God's mercy washed over my heart and He gave me His eyes to see my Dad as He does and here's how i see my Dad today...
generous, funny, down to earth, a great cook, wonderful smile, creative, broken, hurting, and loves me and my family so dearly.
Last week I recieved a letter from my Dad saying all the words I had wished for so long he would say to me, almost a year to the date of my forgiving him. The amazing thing about that letter is I didn't feel how I thought I would feel about recieving it. I thought it would make me feel some how justified in my pain for all those years, kinda like I deserved to feel like that...bitter and angry. But it didn't make me feel deserving at all, it made me feel just the opposite, it made me feel unworthy of God's mercy and it made me feel sad for my Dad not having a friendship with Jesus. God calls us all to be OAKS OF RIGHTOUSNESS, A SPLENDER FOR HIS GLORY and I knew in my unforgiveness i had not been that for God. He asks us to forgive our enemies and here I held onto unforgiveness like a security blanket.
As I sat in church today, filled with gratitude, all I could think of was my Dad and just how much God loves us all. I thought about how God has filled me up so completely that, in Him, I have been made new and His mercy gives me beauty for my ashes. And I thought about God's generosity to me, giving me my Husband, my Priest, and my Father in Law. I no longer have an absent dad...I have FIVE FATHERS! God is Good!

                                                          My Husband, my Best Friend
The man who taught me love, patience, and trust. You are my Heaven on Earth! I admire, respect, and adore you and the kind Father you are to our babies. I have learned so much from you, love of my life. xo

 I'm always amazed at what comes out of me on this little blog of mine. I never mean to go deep yet somehow I always end up here. My prayer for you, if you are holding onto unforgivness in any way, is that you would lay it at the feet of Jesus. That He would do for you what He did for me.... give you His eyes so that you could see your enemy that way God does....broken.

 "Unforgiveness takes delight in our fear, as it binds our wings and pushes us off the cliff of dispair."

 Come back this week to play "Guess Where", my silly version of Where's Waldo and win a fun prize:)

 Linking up with Jen and my sisters at, stop on over.


  1. Thank you for sharing from your was a blessing to read about how you embraced forgiveness.

  2. Blessings to you Jill...this is beautiful..Isn't it wonderful how God can change a bitter heart and make it brand new...I am sooooo proud of you...congratulations!
    Hugs, XO

  3. my dear sweet jill...
    i have a lump in my throat, what a blessing for you to have come to this place in your heart...i know of what you speak. i went through this same journey with both my parents. my mother is no longer living and i thank god that forgiveness took place in my heart before she died, and today my dad and i share a sweet relationship as i accept him for who he is...
    my heart feels kinda raw reading your post today...i think about you alot and miss you!

  4. Isn't it amazing how He sends along paths when we think we're just wandering around. I was checking out all the new friends Alisa Burke had and clicked on your name. I was so blessed by reading what you wrote about forgiveness. It's something I've been struggling with for a while. Recently, I've seen myself as unworthy of the grace bestowed on me and, as such, have come to realize that I should offer no less grace to those around me.

    Thanks! Nice to meet you.

  5. What freedom there is in forgiveness! I can so relate to your story -- your relationship with your dad, bitterness, forgiveness, restoration. Over the past few years, God has so deeply impressed on my heart Hebrews 12:15: "See to it that no one misses the grace of God."

    He has so poured out His grace in my life ... abundantly ... what a tremendous blessing to be able to extend that same grace ... because He first loved me.

    Thank you for sharing your story...and praise God for what He has done in your life!

  6. What a great tribute, and inspiring to many who struggle in their relationships with their fathers!

    I wanted to let you know about a Meme called “Pay It Forward” @ A Life-Size Catholic Blog. If you can find time to link up with this new Meme it’s a great way to grow our community. Check it out at:

    Many blessings…

  7. Oh, sweet Jill. I am so glad that you linked this up today. I love getting a glimpse of your life and your heart. I love how honestly you tell your story and how much you give glory to our Awesome Father!

  8. Thanks for sharing something so real with us.

    I'm working on a post about forgivness. I'm not good at forgiving, a true grudge holder. EVERYWHERE I go this week, I run into thoughts, verses, posts, quotes. . .all on forgiveness.

  9. What an utterly beautiful story on forgiveness. I am so blessed that you revealed your heart here and allowed us in to share in the joy.

    And how do you get the font to look handwritten??

  10. Tears Jill. So grateful to read your beautiful story of forgiveness and gratitude. Five fathers... what a wonderful blessing! Thank you for sharing your beautiful heart. ♥

  11. A beautiful story you have shared. My heart is touched reading of your journey to forgiveness.


  12. Such a beautiful story about forgiveness. Thanks for sharing your testimony.

  13. My dear sweet friend, my heart is happy for you. The truest gift to yourself is to forgive others. I'm sorry I've been out of touch, but I plan to be better about it now! I think we need to do INDY in the fall - don't you? Love and hugs! kel :)